Farewell dear friends

Writing this one took me a while, as I've been juggling this idea for quite some time. Most of you know that I've been struggling in the last
3 years with my creative business, health and life in a general sense. Just as I was regaining control of my health, the company I worked for
23 years closed my department. Somewhere in the back of my mind, I had blamed all of my struggles on my health. But when I lost my day job, I was forced to examine my life and what I wanted it to be more closely. I'm going to be really candid about what's in my mind.

It's easy when you have a steady income with great benefits to let life be and not question things, but here I was with an open road in front of me. The thought of finding a similar job right away frankly made me feel sick. 
I impulsively signed up for a 6 months UX design class to get a degree and enrich my design knowledge. I specialized in print design at the time. Even if I dabbled a bit in digital, my technical understanding wasn't enough to make me feel secure about it. 

I was put in a position and privilege to take the time I needed to figure out what the heck I wanted to be when I grew up. It was a strange, exhilarating feeling to do so at 47. It was also anxiety-inducing. Let's just say it's been an odd year. I was conscious of the privilege while having moments when I was folding a pile of clothes looking around me, and asking myself if I would lose everything when the money ran out.

Some days I would wake up really energized and ready to conquer the world, while on others, I felt like hiding. I fought this feeling a lot. I met new people, and some acquaintances turned into great friendships. Reconnected with people that I missed dearly without even realizing it. I'm thankful for these friendships and even some strangers that helped me put my self-doubt aside and begin to see what I wanted and did not want anymore. 

When I was approached to teach online in 2015, my day job wasn't fulfilling my creative needs. I've been there too long doing the same thing. I accepted without thinking because it was a challenge and desperately needed one. I was hooked from the get-go. I never considered myself the best at anything, but I am passionate about sharing knowledge and helping others feel the same greatness I do when I create. The collaboration I did was successful. It gave me the guts to do it on my own, and a Canvas Journey was born. That class success exceeded, by far, the goals I had fixed for myself. A success I haven't been able to reproduce since. I put much pressure on myself to recreate it while working full-time, but it was not sustainable. 

When I lost my day job, I thought maybe It was time to put all the ideas into action; I had the time. It saddens me a bit to admit this, but I realized that time wasn't the only problem, but I simply didn't find joy in it. I lack the resources and network to create the class I want, and also, to teach something, you have to practice it and know it. The reality is that my art is evolving, and I don't have anything else to teach. I'm learning and changing on many fronts, both in my creative business and my new day job. It's not something I do simply to pay the bills and buy art supplies anymore. I'm learning every day and challenging myself.

This brings me to a tough decision. Next September, I will retire all the online classes from the site; I don't have the time or energy to advertise and sell them. I'm telling you this now to give you enough time to download the classes you bought from me. I can't afford to host everything if it's just sitting there. Each class is a bit different, but under each video, there is a download button. These videos can be heavy, so you may need an external hard drive to copy them; alternatively, you can save them on the cloud. The choice is yours. 

Does this all mean I will stop creating and sharing? Absolutely not. But for now, my practice will concentrate on playing and creating a body of work for myself to exhibit and sell instead of classes. I hope that you will understand and that we will keep sharing. I'm just an email away. You can also follow me on Facebook and Instagram; I will still post videos, tips and inspiration; I will never stop creating; I will just do it differently. I'm beginning a new career, and that's where my mind needs to focus now. I'm also aiming for a more balanced work and social life. Maybe in a couple of years,  my creative process will evolve so that I will have more classes in me.

As a thank you for your support over the years, all classes are at 50% until August 1st. Giving you the time to download everything and get to it when you're ready. No code is needed; the prices are already reduced in the store. 

I wish you all a happy and creative life and see you soon, I'm just an email away.
Karine